"While men and women can be friends, it is difficult for the relationship to be entirely platonic. Our genetics simply drive our attraction to the opposite sex! The likelihood that at least one party is drawn to the other sexually is very high, regardless of whether or not anything ever comes of it. This is the reason jealousy and infidelity exists; we are not wired to be a monogamous species."
Dr. Soroya Bacchus, 51, Psychiatrist
As a psychology undergraduate student, I find myself reading several articles per week. Most of them are related to the modules I am currently doing, however some are just due to my curiosity nature. Having that said, today I read a very interesting article by a scholar from the University of Wisconsin-Eau Claire, USA. She aimed to answer the question of whether man and women could just be friends or any romantic feelings would eventually get in the middle of their relationship and made it unsatisfactory to both.
Cross-sex friendship tend to be fun, there is always a unique connection between male and female relationships — a place of vulnerability, adventure, and an exchange of the heart. However as time goes by, many people report developing feelings for their mates and not being able to express them as cost of the friendship built. Nevertheless, is it a general feeling and rule for all cross-sex friendships or even though it tends to happen in a few cases, romantic feelings-free relationships beetween a guy and a girl are still possible?
Among other findings, this study revealed that in such type of relationship men usually are the first ones to develop feelings, having higher levels of sexual attraction for their females mates, and also tend to believe their cross-sex mate feel the same way, regardless their current romantic involvement stautus, whereas women presented moderate or low levels of attraction for their males mate, rarely seeing their cross-sex mate as a possible romantic partner.
In general, both males and females, having feelings or not, believe that attraction tends to ruin the relationship status and therefore would never express their feelings at a cost of such a beautiful friendship.
Summing up, unrealistic expectations is inevitable in cross-sex relationship but most people move on from their romantic feelings and the relationship is kept intact.
Personally speaking, I don't think the relationship is kept intact. I believe that people eventually will develop feelings, not as a rule, but in most cases and as their degree of satisfaction for the current status of these relationship decreases so will their desire to keep it. Cross-sex relationships are possible as soon as possible romantic feelings are expressed so people can move forward from it. I don't know where I read it, a similar article to this one, saying that a relaxed adult conversation in which both mates would express their feelings is the best way of dealing with this, enabling people to move forward with their lives and in most cases keep the friendship however seldom people will feel comfortable enough to do it.
So, yeah, this is it for today :D Any thoughts on the subject are, as usual, appreciated and well received. Sorry for my absence. I've been busy and tired and my new laptop hasn't arrived yet so I don't really have the time nor the resources to post on a regular basis as I was doing before. I think my laptop is arriving soon thereby very soon Mk will be back to normal.
Additionally, I haven't done the changes I announced a few posts ago yet (same reason as above) but I will definitely be doing them, so keep tuned!
Love always
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